Tuesday, June 26, 2012

My M.O.H Was In Town!

David and I had the very best weekend ever with my sweet best friend from fourth grade and her lovely daughter. I love this friend so much. I cry each and every time I leave or she leaves. She only lives 4 hours away, but our lives are out of control busy and we can only smush in time to see each other every few months. If you know me you know how much I love my friends and it kills me when I don't see them for even a week. So I cherish every minute I get to spend with my dear friend Emily since it's rare to me. And just as precious to me is seeing her tiny perfect daughter. Baby K turned one in March and she could not be cuter or more fun. We had a great weekend meeting one of my other dear friends at the mall to play and have lunch, swimming, playing with Bo, going to a cook out, and just having fun playing. And you know who has even more than I do with Baby K....of course, David. David is addicted to these little kiddos and they are addicted to him. You would have thought him and this baby girl have been BFFs for, well...forever.

Oh My Goodness - BUMP!

Okay are you thinking what I'm thinking? There must be twins in here! I am only 16 weeks you guys. I go to the doctor next week and I am afraid she is going to say, "Woah, lay off the food Miss Bumpy" I am tellin' ya, this bump is out of control (and I love it!).

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Say Cheese...15 weeks

Cheeseburger that is! 

Sorry about the dark self portrait. I'm sure my friend Ally is cringing about this photograph. But it was the best I could do before work this week. This was day one of maternity pants! I borrowed these jeans from my friend Marissa and I am pretty sure I will live in them from here on out. So comfy!

Look at that bump. If you could see me now you wouldn't believe that just four short months ago I wouldn't touch red meat. I had been that way for a few years. It didn't ever settle right for me and I had a lot of stomach problems every time I ate any. Well, that is no longer the case my friends. This baby wants cheeseburgers! I have even tried, in true Phoebe from Friends fashion, to trick this little baby by eating black bean burgers or salmon burgers, anything but hamburgers. But no, no way is this baby havin' it. I have eaten three cheeseburgers in the last week!

And once I've made up my mind that I want one, there's no turning back. One day at lunch I wanted one and opted for a salad filled with beans and eggs for protein instead. I threw up all afternoon until I could get myself and this bump to McDonalds (seriously! McDonalds!). I ate a cheeseburger and was magically healed. I went to the pool and had a wonderful evening after I fulfilled his or her craving (there's no way I'm blaming this on myself or saying "my craving").

I Hold a Grudge

I love that line. "If you forgive, it's completely, completely." 

I haven't struggled too much with the idea of forgiveness. In fact, some people might say that I forgive too easily. I don't necessarily hold a grudge. I get my feelings hurt when I hear about people not forgiving others. Don't get me wrong, I definitely pout and get angry at people and judge people unkindly. I do a lot of things wrong. But I don't have too hard of a time forgiving people. That is, anyone but myself. 

I have done a few things in my life that I let myself feel so badly about that I think I will never forgive myself. I have treated people horribly, and I have made horrible, unchangeable decisions. Some things haunt me from years ago and I think there is no way I will ever forgive myself. And even if I start to forgive myself, a few weeks or months later, a memory will creep back in and I will spend the next few days mad at myself or reminding myself what a horrible person I can be. Obviously, I have not forgiven myself completely. 

I see it as a lack of faith. I don't get to make the decision not to forgive myself. There's nothing that I've done, and there's nothing that you've done, that God hasn't forgiven you for. We don't have the privilege of not forgiving someone and that includes not forgiving ourselves. We have to forgive and we have to forgive completely.

"Otherwise it wouldn't be forgiveness."

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Calling June the Month of Tolstoy

I have to admit that I am an English who has never read Anna Karenina. But do not judge me too harshly yet. Today I grabbed it from the library and threw on my bikini and am sitting at the pool, bump and all, reading it like it is my job. I read on one of the millions of pregnancy blogs I read that you should do the things you might not have time to do once the baby is here. I am thinking reading an 837 page novel might be one of those things. I am already on page 18 and loving it. I will keep you posted! Happy summer reading friends!

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

14 Weeks Already!

I can't believe I'm already 14 weeks pregnant! Last week David and I got to hear the precious heartbeat again. I could sit and listen all day every day. It is the very best sound. This past week I have stopped feeling so sick! Something clicked and I'm not getting sick every day, actually not even every other day anymore. And I'm not nauseous all day either. I am still pretty tired, but that's not so bad. Some fun things I want to remember about this time are how David woke up every single morning and made this little egg and cheese english muffin I love for me. I eat that and drink orange juice every single day. And this week I also was able to go back to eating my peanut butter sandwich (I used to eat this every single day for lunch and haven't been able to stomach it for 10 weeks!). This week I also can't stop eating tacos. Tacos have been a constant almost this whole time, but especially this week I have been in love! Well, tacos and anything at all from Taco Bell. And I want to remember that I had my first baby dream. I had a dream that our precious little baby (who David and I are convinced is a girl) was a boy. Two nights later my mom had a dream about the same thing. So I guess we will just have to wait and see!

Never Be Ordinary

Sister #2 is getting married very soon, and this past weekend we celebrated that fact. A few months ago me and her nine other bridesmaids went wedding dress shopping and she handed us each a book, one of her favorites of all time, Summer Sisters by Judy Blume. I won't spoil this book (and I won't send it to you in a giveaway because Sister #2 gave me her copy to read and it's precious to see her notes), but it is the perfect summer read. And I was almost finishing it for the millionth time since middle school when I paused to help throw a wedding shower for my summer sister. Everything about summer reminds me of Sister #2. When I think of summer I think of sitting on our bench outside our apartment, of the Plaza art festival and fire pits on the river under the bridge outside our apartment, and laying out, drinking our (in)famous cucumber lime vodka drinks. I think about Royals games and cookouts. I think about running and singing country songs. All of these memories include Sister #2. So this weekend I took a break from reading Summer Sisters to celebrate summer and my sister. My sister who swore herself into the NBO group years and years ago. And yesterday, sitting by the pool, thinking about this wonderful summer weekend, I finished the book and started the summer.

Friday, June 1, 2012

Before and After (After 12 weeks that is)

Take a goooood long look. This is at about 5 weeks and 105 pounds. Kiss that little stomach goodbye!
And just a few weeks later - 12 weeks and quite a bump!

Baby Richy - Due December 7th

Today I'm 13 weeks pregnant with our first baby Richy. David and I could not be more excited...Bo on the other hand could be. I knew I was pregnant a few days before David did. Well I tried to tell him and he just couldn't believe it. We were so excited all morning, and by lunch had decided we better wait a few days and take a test again because the first line was so faint. I knew in my heart I was pregnant. I took a test every day for the next four days, but David was set on not knowing until the weekend, until he felt more sure. One Thursday night I encouraged him to stop and pick up a pregnancy test that said Pregnant or Not Pregnant. He did, but still thought I should wait until the weekend. Once we got home, I took one of course. I mean, who is he kidding, he knows me right? I have no patience. I asked him if he was sure he wanted to wait until the weekend. I guess he knew that meant it was positive. We spent the next few hours in shock, thanking God that we were having a baby, and just asking each other over and over if it was true. We spent the next few weeks just dying to tell our family and friends, but knew I was only about a month along and that we would have to wait. We tried to cherish this time, this short time that only the two of us (and Bo) knew such a wonderful secret.

I'm Back!

I know I have been missing in action for a few weeks.... make that 13 to be exact...and the reason i know it has been 13 is because...yep, you guessed it... I am 13 weeks pregnant! quite honestly I haven't been reading anything that I thought you'd be all that interested in. Unless you count parenting styles and developing fetuses as interesting. I do :) I cannot wait to share some pictures and exciting memories. I will post all along the way and not just about baby and pregnancy stuff so stick with me.